Saturday, August 29, 2009

Ritual Goat Sacrifices?

Over a hundred goats have been stolen from farms in Dodge and Green Lake Counties this summer. Authorities are baffled. What are the goat-rustlers up to?

This seemingly-unrelated case in Winona, Minnesota may provide a clue. A woman painted a goat purple and shaved a #4 into its side. She trussed it up and put it in her trunk prior to slaughtering it. The goat was rescued, however, when the woman had to stop to buy a tire. Presumably, she obtained the goat legally (the article doesn't say). The goat has since been adopted by a Wisconsin couple after sheltering temporarily with a Winona veterinarian.

My theory is that the Wisconsin goat-thefts were perpetrated either by enraged Packers fans who intend to curse Brett Favre and his new team, the Vikings, or by desperate Cubs fans who are trying to lift the curse of the billy-goat. If a flock of goats are turned loose to graze in the friendly confines of Wrigley Field, at least we'll know where they came from.


Deekaman said...

Or it could be ANSAC. Back in the 70's, the rumor mill was all atwitter about this. Cattle were being ritually slaughtered, it said, out west. Some said aliens, some said "mad scientist" while others blamed the US military.

I think you have a better explanation.

Dan said...

I'll bet on the Cubs. It won't do them any good, because, well, they are the Cubs and just like the Bears, they still suck.