Dark Knight Rises Copycats?

It was expected that last month's shooting at the premiere of The Dark Knight Rises might inspire copycats.

Last weekend, an Ohio man was arrested after he brought a gun, ammo and knives into a screening of the movie.  He was seated in the center of the back row, with a large duffel bag (he may as well have worn a sign that said "sniper wanna-be").

But in a less violent case of life perhaps imitating art, one of the movie's odder subplots was eerily echoed at the beginning of August when a brokerage firm found itself the victim of rogue trades supposedly caused by a "glitch" in the firm's newly-installed software.  The brokerage made a large volume of bad bids, other brokerages exploited their errors, and the firm found itself nearly bankrupt in a day.  The broader market was not affected, seemingly, as share prices did not swing significantly.

(Spoiler Alert) - in the movie, the villains break into the stock exchange (literally), and install their own software to execute a high volume of trades, targeting just one firm (Wayne Enterprises) in order to wipe out most of its worth and allow a corporate takeover.  They do this to gain access to a particular corporate asset that they can weaponize.

I was surprised that the ExtremeTech article did not mention, while discussing the feasibility of breaking into the stock exchange, that it is not actually necessary to do so.  Plenty of brokerage firms with lesser security than the NYSE have the ability to execute high volumes of trades electronically, and the article's comments do point that out, but the commenters assume the market would stop trading and all erroneous trades would be reversed.

By the time I saw the movie, and by the time the article was posted, however, the debacle at a brokerage coincidentally named Knight Capital was in the news.  Their trades were not reversed, and the company barely survived with an emergency credit deal.

Of course, Knight Capital was not deliberately targeted (at least, not that anyone can tell).  There would be no real motive, except to make a bit of money at their expense on the day of the software disaster, and I believe those profits were split among many firms.  It's not like Knight had a coveted corporate asset that they would not sell unless they were in dire straits.  Then again, maybe they did.

Elon Musk: Hero or Villain?

I always assumed Elon Musk was more of a Bond villain, but a website makes a clever comparison between Musk and Tony Stark:
Created by: OnlineGraduatePrograms.com

The Gold Bug

In Ian Fleming's Goldfinger, the eponymous villain, heavily invested in gold, sought to increase the value of his horde by destroying the United States' gold reserves at Fort Knox.

It would have been far more lucrative for him to boost demand for gold, rather than reduce the supply, by destabilizing the world's economy.  Rather than employing a specialist assassin like Oddjob (who probably didn't work cheap and likely incurred very large equipment and cleanup expenses), he could have employed some lobbyists and creative investment brokers to invent complicated debt-based investment vehicles, then pull down the house of cards and watch the value of gold skyrocket as the world financial markets imploded and government bonds were downgraded.

Maybe the upcoming Bond 23 should be a remake of Goldfinger.  Of course, people may have trouble believing that a criminal conspirator could con everyone into driving up the price of gold.  Oh, wait...

Dan Kapanke Has a Plan

He just needs to get those pesky public employees to sleep the day away on July 12.

Finally, some good news

Daniel Craig will return as James Bond. (h/t Screen Rant).

It's either an early Christmas (or Saturnalia) present, or a fabulous Channukah present (depending on your personal beliefs).

Time to Remake Smokey and the Bandit?

Anyone old enough to have seen Smokey and the Bandit may remember that the plot revolved around a bet/dare involving the illegal transport of a regional microbrew with a cult following across state lines from Texas to Georgia in time for a special event.

The beer in the movie was Coors, which became a nationally-available brand not too many years after Burt Reynolds first drove that TransAm. I thought that movie plot was a quaint relic of the past, in today's age of widely available craft beers.

It seems I was wrong. Some latter-day, real-life Bandit is running Spotted Cow to a bar in New York City that is known for Wisconsin alumni events.

Does that mean that, a decade from now, Spotted Cow Light will be the drink of choice of college kids across the nation?

It Depends What Your Definition of "Don't" Is

Cable channel G4 has a regular movie feature called "Movies That Don't Suck."

Last night's presentation was The Matrix Reloaded.

"Red Dawn" Will Stay Red

I've been morbidly curious about the upcoming remake of Red Dawn ever since I first heard about it last year. Will it take place in the present, the near future, or in some alternate version of 1985 (like The Watchmen)? If the present, who will the invaders be?

While the script has undergone at least two re-writes (never a good sign), reports are that, in the remake, the invaders are the Russians and the Chinese (h/t ScreenRant). I'm not even sure why they need the Russians anymore; it might have been scarier and more topical if it were the Chinese and the North Koreans.

Anyway, I'm still morbidly curious. Will it be a deliberate allegory on our invasion of Iraq? If so, it would be hard to top the original in that respect. Seriously, get it from Netflix sometime (or fire up the old VHS if you actually own the video) and watch it with these substitutions in mind:

Americans = Iraqis
Russians = Americans
Cubans = Brits

Vaya con dios.

Will Adrian Zmed Get a Cameo?

The Onion A-V Club reported this week that The Weinstein Company will produce a movie version of T. J. Hooker, the 1980s cop show that starred William Shatner. Since I first saw it in The Onion, I hoped it was a joke. Unfortunately, the story is corroborated by industry mag Variety.

Is anyone actually nostalgic for T. J. Hooker? Besides Adrien Zmed, that is?

Lessons Learned from the New Star Trek Movie

1. Centaurian slugs are far more effective than waterboarding for collecting actionable intelligence.

2. The Beastie Boys' Sabotage and Chevrolet's Corvette are both timeless classics.

3. In the 23rd century, bright and attractive female college students will still bonk their instructors.

4. Small, cute aliens are much more tolerable when they're mute.

5. Samuel L. Jackson must not be a Star Trek fan.

Attack of the Remakes

Back in 1995, science fiction author Connie Willis published a novel called Remake about a near-future Hollywood where the film industry churns out nothing but CGI remakes of classic films, starring digitized versions of dead actors.

The reality is far more horrifying. Hollywood is making mostly remakes of mediocre-to-crappy films and movies based on video games. I thought it was bad when I learned that remakes of Red Dawn and Clash of the Titans were in the works. Now, Screen Rant reports that remakes of Videodrome (which starred Debbie Harry), Back to School (the Rodney Dangerfield comedy that was filmed on the UW-Madison campus) and Short Circuit (which inexplicably spawned a sequel back in the 1980s) are in our future.

I'll admit to a certain anticipatory curiosity about the upcoming remake of They Live (the 1988 cult sci-fi satire starring "Rowdy" Roddy Piper). However, if I ever hear of plans for a remake of Gymkata, I will know the Apocalypse is at hand.

Coraline May Be the Year's Best Horror Movie

It's well-made, creepy and dark, like a Brothers Grimm fairy tale for the Internet age. The PG rating definitely stands for parental guidance -- don't take young children to this movie. One would think that, in these days of South Park and Robot Chicken, parents would not assume that anything animated is meant for all ages, but one would be wrong. In the theater last night, I heard a young tyke loudly bawling that it was too scary. Fortunately, the parents were sufficiently responsible to leave with the child at that point. Older kids will probably be fine. If the idea of an animated elderly burlesque queen putting on a show in pasties offends your sensibilities, however, keep your kids at home.

My Picks for the Razzies

The nominations for the 2008 Golden Raspberry Awards have been announced.
(h/t screenrant).

A lot of people are making Oscar predictions. For now, I'm going to stick with predicting the Razzies.

Worst Picture: The Love Guru (just based on the trailers I saw).

Worst Actor: Larry the Cable Guy (for Witless Protection). I think Mike Myers and Eddie Murphy will split the vote for once-respected-comic-actor-known-for-playing-multiple-roles-who-is-now-scraping-the-bottom-of-the-barrel, leaving the he-only-ever-plays-one-character vote in the lead.

Worst Actress: Paris Hilton (for the Hottie and the Nottie). Because no one can resist ridiculing Paris Hilton.

Worst Supporting Actor: Pierce Brosnan (for Mama Mia!). He never should have tried to sing.

Worst Supporting Actress: Kim Kardashian (for Disaster Movie). Unless Paris Hilton somehow doesn't "win" Worst Actress, in which case she will get this consolation Razzie (for Repo: the Genetic Opera).

Worst Screen Couple: Eddie Murphy IN Eddie Murphy (in Meet Dave). Because he must be stopped before he makes any more of these crappy multiple-roles movies.

Worse Prequel, Remake, Rip-off or Sequel: The Day the Earth Blowed Up Real Good. Because Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull will have to compete with Star Wars: Clone Wars for the stop-George-Lucas-before-he-destroys-another-cherished-memory-of-my-youth vote.

Worst Director: M. Night Shyamalan (for The Happening). Because Uwe Boll (who made three crappy movies that were released in 2008) is being recognized with a special Razzie, this one should go to Shyamalan, who was once a respected director and still has delusions of greatness.

Worst Screenplay: Mike Myers & Graham Gordy (for The Love Guru).

Worst Career Achievement (Special Category): Uwe Boll ("Germany's answer to Ed Wood"). Because he's the only one nominated.